


This Is How You Lose Armageddon

by MiraMira



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, This is How You Lose the Time War - Amal El-Mohtar & Max Gladstone
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Angel/Demon Relationship, Biblical Scripture References (Abrahamic Religions), Crisis of Faith, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Epistolary, F/F, Religion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:09:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28333644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiraMira/pseuds/MiraMira
Summary: Some angels - or agents - don't so much Fall as Saunter Vaguely Downthread.
Relationships: Blue/Red (This is How You Lose the Time War)
Comments: 12
Kudos: 36
Collections: Yuletide Madness 2020





	This Is How You Lose Armageddon

**Author's Note:**

  * For [argentconflagration](https://archiveofourown.org/users/argentconflagration/gifts).



> Happy Yuletide, argentconflagration! I loved this crossover idea, and hope I did it even the slightest bit of justice.

_Retrieved from the ashes of a burning bush:_

Dear Goat’s Blood,

I hope you’re pleased with the work you did on Potiphar and his wife. Do you know how much effort it took to maneuver Joseph into a position of influence after you convinced his brothers to sell him into slavery in the first place? 

What am I saying? Of course you do. If they let me requisition a new set of prophetic dreams, it’ll be a minor miracle.

Sincerely,

Breastplate of Judgment

P.S. Crossed paths with War. Are you aware she’s been borrowing your monikers? Bit rude, if you ask me. Or should I be steeling myself against jealousy?

~

_Spelled out in salt grains near the ruins of Sodom:_

Dear Tabernacle Veil,

My begrudging congratulations on your victory in Nineveh. Do you know, you almost had me convinced the whale was part of our strategy? Hastur even tried to take credit for it, the fool. If he’s lucky, they may allow him to reincorporate some time next century.

As for me, I’m off to whisper words in a certain politician’s ear. Have fun guessing which one!

Best,

Unyoked Heifer

P.S. Don’t be silly; you know War’s only love is the battlefield. As for the names, I approve. The confusion has proven quite useful in evading the Opposition. Present company excluded, of course.

~

_Etched on the surface of a Communion wafer:_

Dyed Rams’ Skins, my dearest -

Be truthful with me: is this latest Crusade one of yours? You would think after so many centuries, no twisting or dismissal of the Holy Word could shock me, but my heart remains unhardened. Nor should I wish it so, and yet...

Your faithful correspondent,

Altar Covering

~

_Pieced together from hundreds of “true Cross” splinters:_

My sweet Blessed Robe of the Holy Virgin,

Son of Perdition, no! At least, none of the Lords have told me anything. It doesn’t feel like one of our schemes, though. Oh, someone might have  suggested the business with the children during the planning stages, but it would never have made the cut. Too likely to scuttle the entire thing...or so I would have assumed.

Between you and me, things have gotten away from both our sides a bit, haven’t they? Free will sounds lovely in theory, but the things they’ve done with that freedom… I’m starting to think maybe we should have left the blasted apple alone.

Warmly,

Seven-Headed Dragon

~

_Scattered amid the darkness over the surface of the deep:_

Esau’s Stew,

What was it like to fall? I’m not asking because I  want to defect. I don’t think. I just wonder...is it a thing that can happen by accident? Without noticing? ~~What if you don’t fall so much as fall for--~~

I’m sorry. I’m rambling. I doubt I’ll even send you this mess, although perhaps you’ll find it anyway. But I keep turning your words over and over, about whether the Plan still holds. Our...whatever this is can’t  possibly be part of it, and yet sometimes I fear it’s become my salvation.

Yours,

Knotted Cord

~

_Written in the dust of the broken Commandment tablets:_

Foundation of the New Jerusalem,

I expect you don’t mean the actual falling. That was quite painful. Not least because I didn’t know what physical pain was, before. I was quite surprised to learn you aren’t shielded from it when you incorporate. Seems like the sort of thing a kind and merciful Divinity wouldn’t visit upon Their most faithful servants.

Anyway. Truth be told, I don’t recall much about the process of falling, either. It was a process; I know that much. You don’t wake up one day and decide to rebel against the Creator of All Things. I suppose I simply had more questions than answers, and when the Morningstar spoke even one or two of them aloud, I was eager to listen.

But, dearest Firmament,  do note - and know this warning pains me nearly as much as that first experience - I haven’t found any answers here, either.

Yours,

Shield of Mighty Warriors

~

_Tucked into a crack of the Western Wall:_

Red,

Where, then?

Blue

~

_Captured in the echoes of the Last Trumpet:_

B.,

I’ll be brief. There are rumors - perhaps you’ve heard them - of a place where good and evil are not bitter rivals, but balancing forces. Where angels and demons can lay down their swords, flaming or otherwise, and take tea together, and perhaps even stroll down by the pond to feed the ducks.

Maybe it’s a trap, but I’m prepared to take the risk. If you are as well, I’ll see you in Lower Tadfield.

Love,

R.


End file.
